OOPS!
Calling attention to gaming's biggest fuck-ups. 

Capcom remains undecided over Super Street Fighter IV rape price.

A recent Super Street Fighter IV-related article at Kotaku reads "Capcom is still debating whether to sell the game for the traditional price of console titles or a lower price, Killian said."

As I've said before, Capcom's so far FUCKED UP to all hell on Street Fighter IV. The game received nary an update, features minimal content compared to competitors, is littered with various grotesquely lopsided matches, and includes some of the worst 2D animation seen in a title this generation, Triple-A title or non. The game rides the fucking nostalgia wave, and we all bite into it, myself included.

We'll all buy SUPER DUPER NEATO Street Fighter IV when it releases next year, no matter the price. Capcom knows this, yet they remain hesitant to drop the inevitable price bomb. Why? They know they'll be in trouble. Has a pre-teen ever approached you, head down, hands behind his or her back, and proceeded to admit something he or she's guilty of? It's like that, but on a corporate level. 

Another theory: Capcom's waiting to see if we pull out of this recession by next year. If we do, they'll charge more. If not, they might charge a little less. 

One last theory: Capcom's checking the title over - making sure it doesn't include any potentially racist content (sup Resident Evil 5?). Somehow, Dee Jay and El Fuerte will remain. Actually, I heard in their double secret ending they both visit Mexico City. El Fuerte makes the best fried chicken in the world for Dee Jay. The government then rules the chicken so good it's illegal, and tries to arrest the duo. After running for hundreds of miles, they jump over the fence and enter the U.S. There, a reformed Abel tries to sell them life insurance. After they refuse, Rufus, now a devout Christian, eats El Fuerte's foot because he's hungry, and threatens to eat the rest unless he buys the most expensive plan from Abel. Dee Jay and El Fuerte give in, eventually gain citizenship and full-time jobs, but are unable to live comfortable lives due to mounting bills from Fuerte's constantly infected stub where his foot used to be. As they're discussing the future over a few glasses of orange soda, a newsflash brightens their screen: "Zangief reformed the Soviet Union and has fired the Omega Machine. In 30 seconds, he will effectively piledrive the Earth into the sun." THE END

Comment

Oops! Archive

 


follow me on Twitter

« Criticism explained. | Main | My Superficial homepage – a browser confessional. »
Friday
11Sep2009

Swayed by a new artstyle, an interview, and clever marketing. Someone at Gearbox deserves a raise.

I didn’t care about Borderlands as I left last year’s E3. At the “exclusive” behind closed-doors sneak peek of  the upcoming multiplatform title, Gearbox CEO and president Randy Pitchford sold his product to journalists like a budding Billy Mays trainee. But Pitchford was no Mays. Billy always capably communicated product taglines and marketing jargon without shame or the slightest hint of fatigue. We all laughed at the man shilling product after product in precisely-cut 60 second commercials, but we found the image of his beard unshakeable when we finally saw the product within arm’s reach on a shelf at Target. Buying the item meant we’d be helping out ol’ Billy, or at least it sometimes felt that way.

If I had any desire to buy Borderlands following E3 2008, it was out of pity for Randy Pitchford.

Dude seemed like a nice guy. Passionate too. But his cheesey and overenthusiastic presentation briefly led me to believe the man was once employed as a Wiggle. Why did Mr. Pitchford leave the multimillion-dollar empire? To pursue a career in the videogame industry? Or was it some pithy disagreement over the group’s affinity for solid colored shirts and Randy’s own passion for Hawaiian prints? Only the guys in the purple, blue, red, and yellow shirts, and Randy, know.

“OH, THAT’S A GREAT SHOTGUN! WOW! LOOK AT THAT!” I remember Randy nearly shouting as another Gearbox employee played the game. “YEAH! GO THERE! OH! HEAD SHOT!” I almost broke out laughing. The situation was too much. “Is this what the industry’s like?” I remember thinking. I was still fairly new to the business, with only a year as a “professional” member under my belt. This stuff could’ve been the norm! “Oh, what a delightful time this would be…”

Taking a break, my eyes wandered around the room. People were gorging on the cheese. Grins, ear to ear, filled the room. The goons apparently loved this stuff.

I didn’t. With or without Randy, the game still looked like a videogamey first-person shooter awkwardly trying to fit in big boy Mad Max pants. Pitchford’s repeated comments regarding the “revolutionary” system designed to procedurally generate millions of guns overshadowed the developer’s more laudable intentions behind blending the role-playing and shooter genres in a “new and exciting way.” At this stage, Borderlands was a series of great ideas, but lacked focus and, more importantly, any discernable identity. Faceless doesn’t sell.

A year and three months later, and after finally interviewing Pitchford regarding Borderlands, I’m bugging the PR team for a copy of the game. I can’t wait to play this title in October.

So what happened? A series of well-executed, and well-timed, changes and events.

Read the rest at IPR's Multimedia blog.

PrintView Printer Friendly Version

EmailEmail Article to Friend

Reader Comments

There are no comments for this journal entry. To create a new comment, use the form below.

PostPost a New Comment

Enter your information below to add a new comment.

My response is on my own website »
Author Email (optional):
Author URL (optional):
Post:
 
Some HTML allowed: <a href="" title=""> <abbr title=""> <acronym title=""> <b> <blockquote cite=""> <code> <em> <i> <strike> <strong>